Jokes / Bar Jokes
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Deaf Genie ->
A man walks into a bar and sees a guy with a really big lighter. He asks the man,"Where did you get such a big lighter?" The man replies,"See that man playing piano over there? He's a genie and he'll grant you one wish." So the guy walks over t... [cały ->]
Who needs women ->
A man walks into the bar and orders 2 shots of whiskey and the man drinks one and pours the other shot in his hand, the man did this 3 times before the bartender finally asks him ----why is it you drink 1 shot and pour the other in your hand. The ... [cały ->]
Tough guy eh? ->
A man and his girlfriend are at a bar when the girl goes to the bathroom. When she comes back she's crying. Her boyfriend asks her what happend. "As I was leaving the bathroom, a big guy at the pool table said he wanted to kiss my breasts all nigh... [cały ->]
The Telepathic Watch! ->
A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?" "No", he replies... [cały ->]
The Punk and the Old Fart ->
There was an old man in a bar who was staring at a punk in the corner. The punk had multicolored, spiked hair and multicolored feather earings. After a while the punk got mad and said to the old man "What are you staring at?" "Back when I was i... [cały ->]
The Gay in the Bar ->
A gay guy walks into a bar and says "bartender give me a brewskie." The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The gay continues, "I'll just sit in the corner and drink my beer and won't say anything." The bartender says, "Well, al... [cały ->]
The fully fledged alaskan ->
There's this guy and he lives in the second largest state in America, which is California, and he want's to live in the largest state of America which is Alaska. So he goes there for a few weeks and decides he wants to become a fully-fledged Alska... [cały ->]
The Fight! ->
Kelly limps into his favorite pub... My god! What happened to you?" the bartender asked Kelly as he hobbled in on a crutch, one arm in a cast. "I got in a tiff with Riley", whispered Kelly to the beertender. "Riley? He's just a wee fellow," ... [cały ->]
The Crying Horse ->
One day a guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "if you can make that horse over there laugh you can have free drinks for the rest of the night". So he says "ok" and walks over to the horse and whispers something in his ear and he starts laugh... [cały ->]
The best bar in the world... ->
A Scotsman, American, and an Irishman are in a bar. They are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice place. Then the Scotsman says, "Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Glasgow, there's a better one. At MacDoug... [cały ->]
The Bar ->
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar: ------------------------------------- | Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 | | Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 | | Hand Job: $10.00 | ------------------------------------- Checking his wall... [cały ->]
The Ballerina ->
This nasty, sweaty woman, wearing a sleeveless sundress, walks into a bar. She raises her right arm, revealing a big hairy armpit as she points to all the people sitting at the bar and asks, "What man out there will buy a lady a drink?" The whole ... [cały ->]
Suzy's Legs ->
There were three guys in a new bar that just openened and the bartender asked them what he should call his new bar. One guy said, "just name it a pub." Another said, "just name it the bar." The thrid guy said, "name it Suzy's Legs". The owner... [cały ->]
Strip Joint ->
Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club. The doorman at the club greets them and says, ... [cały ->]
Slammin 'em down! ->
A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barman, "Give me six double vodka." The barman says, "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day." "Yes, I've just found out my older brother is gay." The next day the same guy came into the bar and ... [cały ->]